A relationship can be made better or worse by how partners communicate with each other. Communication is vital in any relationship, especially with your partner. Read the full blog to see to see why.

Benefits of good communication

It helps in forming a bond with our partner.
It makes us get to know their personality better.
It can help avoid conflict among each other.
Solving problems in the relationship is easier with good communication.
We understand our partner’s feelings better.
Our partner understands our feelings better.
It helps build trust in the relationship through transparency of words.

All in all good communication can make a relationship stronger, easier, and more fun to be in.

Lack of communication can be detrimental to a relationship. Bad communication can lead to a lack of interest in the relationship, anger towards your partner, inability to form a deep bond, and trust issues to name a few.

This type of communication is usually powered by negative emotions rather than constructive thinking with goodwill. And it must be avoided in relationships.

Here Are 14 Ways To Communicate Better With Your Partner

It would be more beneficial to get your partner on board and work on your communication together.

1] Be kind with your words

The words we use to communicate can aid in making or breaking the bond with your partner. Being kind with your words is crucial when communicating. Especially during a disagreement. Cursing while talking, and using abusive or mean words should be avoided.

Substitute the use of harsh language with kind language. Talk to your partner with affection and love. And make this a habit. Communication is the art of expressing what’s in your heart and mind, not a war of words. Mind what you say, and choose what you want to say carefully.

2] Listening is just as important as communicating

Paying attention to your partner when they speak will help you communicate better in a relationship. Communication is a two-way street between the speaker and the listener. And communication fails when either one of them isn’t partaking in their roles.

Be an active listener and understand what your partner is saying. Give them your full attention. Also, make sure they know when you agree with something they say. This will boost your partner’s confidence in the conversation and make them more eager to listen to you when you speak.

3] Set clear intentions before the conversation

Have a goal in mind for the conversation you want to have with your partner. Make sure that you know what you want to achieve with the conversation, whether it’s solving an issue or getting to know your partner better, it can be anything as long as you set your end goal for the conversation. Communicate this with your partner and involve them with your goals and intentions.

And don’t drift off-topic. It’s easy to find the conversation to be moving from one topic to another. But keep your mind focused on the goal at hand. Whenever you find the conversation drifting off topic, bring yourself back to the intended conversation. And you can also ask your partner to do the same.

4] Assume that your partner knows something that you may not

A great way to maintain the spark in conversations is to always be under the assumption that your partner may know something about life, people or the world that you may not. Think about it. Your partner has gone through situations and experiences that you may not have. You may have gone through the same situation but your partner may have taken something from that experience that you may not have thought of. They may have learnt about a particular topic that you haven’t. And they may have even been taught something that you weren’t.

Doesn’t that make them interesting? No matter how much you think you know them? They know so much that we don’t. They have so much to offer through their wisdom and experience. This assumption can make your partner more mysterious to you – like when you met them initially and you wanted to get to know them better, and this can definitely make conversations more interesting and help you communicate more.

5] There must be only one winner – The relationship

The desire to be right and the need to win is present in every individual. When either of the partners has this burning desire in a conversation, it leads to an argument where both partners are frustrated. And if one of the partners gets their way, it usually means that the other one doesn’t. This builds resentment of one partner to the other.

The most reasonable approach to this problem is to create a win-win situation where both partners are satisfied. Both partners may not always get what they want a hundred per cent. So minor sacrifices with personal wants should be made by both partners.

Although hard to do, it’s best practice for both partners to leave aside their personal desires and let the relationship win rather than one partner.

6] Your partner is not the enemy

Every individual makes mistakes. And when our partner does or says something that we may think is against us, it affects the relationship. We tend to think of them badly. We wonder how they could do such a thing and how they could hurt us. And we get angry at them and arguments tend to be a form of conversation a lot of the time. We think of them as the enemy. This is far from the truth.

A relationship starts off with the feeling of liking which eventually turns into the feeling of love. How could your enemy like or love you? Understand that your partner is human and makes mistakes, even against you sometimes. And This is completely okay, it happens in every relationship.

Communicate with your partner as if they were your friends, and you will see the conversations getting better.

7] Tolerance before confrontation

Tolerance is the key to dealing with the behaviour of others. Your partner may be quite different from you in the way they behave, their personality traits, or their preferences. If your partner does something that you really don’t like, be tolerant of their behaviour and do not confront them immediately. Give them time and space to be themselves. You can’t change your partner’s behaviour and you shouldn’t either. It must be a conscious effort from their side.

Give your partner a few chances to repeat their behaviour. Let’s say three chances. When they have repeated the same behaviour the fourth time, confront them kindly. And explain to them why you feel the way you do. And tell them about how you tolerated it, and that you can’t anymore. This will help your partner know that you are doing the best you can.

8] Be truthful and sincere

Truthfulness in a relationship is extremely important, and without it, the relationship breaks apart. Lies and dishonesty pull you apart from transparency and trust in a relationship. Make sure that you are truthful in conversation. It helps your partner know how you really feel, builds trust in the relationship and can help solve problems quickly.

Also, make sure that you don’t allow your partner to lie. Ask them to tell the truth. And when they do tell you the truth about how they feel, even though it may hurt you, don’t make them feel bad about it. This would make them lie the next time in order to avoid conflict.

9] Be open with your feelings

Relationships are meant to be a safe space where emotional needs and feelings are shared with one another. This is a vital aspect of a healthy relationship. Conversations with your partner shouldn’t only be superficial. Superficial conversations are too casual and lack impactful substance.

Have deep conversations with your partner from time to time. You may realise that there’s so much about your partner that you haven’t discovered yet. The deeper the conversation, the more impact it will create in forming a strong bond with your partner.

10] Know when it’s the right time to talk

It is best to not have conversations with your partner or confront them when they already have too much on their plate. Or it can come off as insensitive and selfish. If your partner is going through a rough time or they have important commitments to look after, it’s best to be patient and wait for the right time.

Make sure your partner is relaxed and at leisure when you want to have an impactful conversation about the relationship. This is the best time as their attention can be focused on the relationship rather than other important things.

11] Don’t shame your partner

Mistakes are often made by everyone in a relationship. It is good to know how to handle this before it escalates into a deep rested feeling.

Never shame your partner for something they did wrong. Instead, tell them how you feel and why it affected you so much. Tell them that you’d appreciate it if they don’t repeat it. Do not try to make them feel guilty about it. They would have already started to feel guilty after we told them how we felt. We shouldn’t add to their already existing guilt.

Guilt should be realised and eliminated as soon as possible with the intention of correcting our actions in the present and future. Guilt felt for extended periods of time can badly affect a person making them feel very bad about themselves.

12] Try to understand your partner better

Make a conscious effort to get to know your partner more every day. This will open up your conversations to greater depths than before. It will help you be a better listener. This is useful while having opposing views too.

Try to understand your partners’ point of view and where they are coming from. Make it a habit to understand your partner better and you will see yourself arguing less and also finding common ground with their viewpoints.

13] Make sure your partner understands what you are saying

It’s important to articulate your words so that your partner can understand you easily. When we want to get a point across, we often repeat it again and again expecting our partner to understand it after the fifth time. This just doesn’t work.

Explain what you’re trying to say more elaborately and use phrases and words that your partner is familiar with, so they understand it easily.

You can also ask them if they are on board with what you’re trying to say. Move forward if they are, and be patient and explain it again if they aren’t. It can be frustrating for both of you but it will definitely be helpful for the relationship in the end.

14] Communicate every day

Make it a habit to communicate with your partner every day. Talk to each other every day like you were the best of friends.

Keep your conversations alive by focusing on different topics every day. Ask them what they think about a new topic, ask them how they feel today, crack jokes, talk deeply, talk freely, talk with intent, flirt with them, whatever it is, communicate every day with good intentions in mind.

Consistency is key. And when the days go by, you will realize that the relationship is so much better than before.

Quotes on communication

Words are the voice of the heart.
Confucius

Communication in a relationship is like oxygen to life. Without it… it dies.
Tony Gaskins

Communication has the power to cure most ailing relationships.
Jarriel Carter

Ultimately the bond of all companionship, whether in marriage or friendship, is conversation.
Oscar Wilde

I have been in love and it was a great feeling. But love isn’t enough in a relationship. Understanding and communication are very important aspects.
Yuvraj Singh